Motherhood Cliches: The View from the Summit
I've been thinking alot about figurative language recently. I can't tell you if this is because I'm an editor or because the fifth grade has a laser focus on it this year. At our house we tend to go from one person's project to another's pretty seamlessly. Call it a lack of boundaries.
Our most recent study seems to be cliche. I am a cliche, you are a cliche, he, she, it is...no, that's my other daughter's Latin. Those other numbers and genders are not the cliches, I am.
The multi-tasking mother. You know the one. Carpool, groceries, business meetings, lunches, dog poop, dinner, school meetings, out of town trips: is this week the editorial trip or the choir trip? And who will take care of the puppy while I'm away?
The minivan ads make it all look so beautiful, and at it's core, it is: how fine for a woman to have a strong family life and fulfilling work. And if it's a little chaotic sometimes, well that's where Folger's in your cup can just smooth out all the rough edges.
Last week I went to the Mom 2.0 Summit, a conference of bloggers and marketers, all focused on the power inherent in this mom life, rather than its potential for frazzle. Several of our authors were participating--Joanne Bamberger the wise PunditMom from D.C.; Karen Walrond, author of the blog Chookooloonks and The Beauty of Different; Mimi Vance, whose wonderful Words by the Handful books are coming out later this year; Jennifer Randall, one of the four teachers who have created Answer Keys for parents; Elizabeth Irvine, whose books on wellness are just what I need to pay heed to right now; and conference organizer, Laura Mayes, Kirtsy.com co-founder who is responsible for our amazing Kirtsy Takes a Bow book. That crowd alone was enough to get my teeth off the motherhood cliche bone I've been working and get me on to some more nutritious fare.
Beyond the Bright Sky crowd, the conference was filled with even more women who were putting all the pieces of motherhood--of womanhood--together in ways that worked--for them. Isabel Kallman, the AlphaMom; Tracey Clark, one of the visionary ShutterSisters; Kristen Chase, the Mominatrix; and of course, Jenny the indomitable Bloggess. Nurturing, sexy, sweet, wild, virgin, crone, whore, madonna: everybody was there; everybody was inspiring.
I noticed strong commonalities: motherhood, creative drive, authenticity, But more importantly, I noticed uniqueness. It was visible in the outfilts--everything from flowy maxi skirts to FM gladiator pumps, wicked witch striped leggings to Mad Men cocktail attire. But, more importantly than in the trappings, the spirit of individuality was tangible in the conversations.
The theme of the Mom 2.0 Summit this year was "Defining a Movement." As Katherine Center's powerful video proclaimed: What you're doing matters. I dare any mother to watch it without crying.
And it's hard to think back on my experience last week without some of the same emotion: the Summit (interesting word choice, but the view was indeed clearer) , the photography exhibit at Fotofest, the three day coalition of women refusing to be bound by cliche--no matter how appropriate some aspects of it might be.
Today, I'm a little off my game: the antibiotics haven't kicked in yet, the sink is full of dishes, the email in-box is screaming at me, it's supposed to snow and no one could find her jacket this morning. I'm tempted to say, Calgon, take me away. As if it could. But, instead, I'll take Katherine's words to heart: What you're doing matters.
As for the motherhood cliche? I think I'll throw out the figurative language and write my own definition.
If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?
~Milton Berle
Love is the language of poets. It lends itself to figures of speech and flowery language. How do I love thee?
Everyone has a favorite place to read. Mine is a large, overstuffed chintz arm chair in my office. I was looking at a lovely shelter magazine not too long ago that featured style saving tips about how to fix your furniture faux pas, presented in the classic buy/keep/toss format. The most egregious upholstery sin in this article was tacky '80s black chintz. Toss it! With tongs!
When I was a little girl, my brother told me I couldn't carry a tune in a U-Haul. So I hit him.
I've been contemplating the concept of the edge. The leading edge, the bleeding edge, the edge of darkness. And there's always the possibility of going over the edge--being pushed, losing my grip or aligning too closely with the crowd and rushing off terra firma into the abyss. Like the
syn·chro·nic·i·ty : \ˌsiŋ-krə-ˈni-sə-tē, ˌsin-\ noun : circa 1889
Some days I feel so at peace with the world, and other days every last thing seems to make me want to put up my dukes against Unfairness, Injustice, or General Wrongheadedness. And once I get riled up, it's amazing how the most random things become evidence of the current conspiracy.
I'm desperately trying to manage all my communications resources. When to email, when to call, when to meet, when to tweet, when to blog and when to throw my hands up and sob. And then there's Facebook. Not to mention submissions. I want to be accessible, but I also want to be productive.
I just love holidays. I love any reason to celebrate. One of my all-time favorite books is a children's book by Byrd Baylor called
I went to a